DC Traffic

For those not familiar, there are two speed limits in the DC Beltway area: "Yeah, like people are going that slow," or "Hah, as if traffic would ever move that fast."

Show me your references

Look. I work for .gov. And, I'm the first to admit we are a hot mess. BUT - start sharing stories about "thousands of bodies in the trees;" "Body bags on order," "recovery efforts shut down," and so on. Show me your work. The federal government can fuck up a wet dream, zero debate. But, we're in the era where EVERYONE has a camera in their pocket, 24/7. If the evidence was there, it would be out. Natural disasters suck, by definition. Don't make them worse with RUMINT.

Time (keeping) in Retrograde

I like tech. I like convenience. This isn't anything new - I still remember working on a TRS-80 and a Zenith microcomputer in the 80's learning this "personal computer" stuff. So, no surprise, I've had a smartwatch. Super convenient. Preview messages. Check the weather. See appointments. So on, and so on, and so on. Except. Well, it started bothering me. Sure, it's great on the commute to see a text from my wife and be able to respond. Or to preview an email and decide how important it is. But, it was also intrusive. Texts at dinner buzzing on my wrist, driving the dopamine hit to "Just see what it says." Random moments at night, some notification that I had to determine whether or not was worthy of my attention. Spam calls hitting another piece of tech as I navigated my day. Not to mention, the times at work I can't have it on, given the spaces I'm in - so, then, what's the point, if I don't even have the tool? All this to say, about three weeks ago I pulled out the analog option. Dive watch, rated deeper than I ever intentionally plan to go again. GMT hand so I can keep my family's time zone visible even when I'm a world away. No bells. No whistles. No messages, previews, or vibrations. So far? It's been positive. I like being able to just look and see the uncluttered "it's this time". I certainly don't miss the digital intrustions. There's been moments of "phantom pain," and some times I'm like "Ugh, it would be nice to just..." - but, so far, the good outweighs the bad. Not selling off the smart watch yet. But, six months from now? Time will tell.

Welcome to My TED Talk

Just got back from a 23 hour return flight from overseas, no complaints there, honestly. Rather, I had to point out to one of the leaders over in our "International Office" that this was the sixth successful, well-received, and "we'd like more" workshop I'd done for them in just the past few years on a total of five of the seven continents. And, that, thereby, I would be updating my bio shortly to state "World-renowned speaker". I mean, that's how it works, right?

I think we fought a revolution over crap like this?

So, there's a bit of a kerfluffle going on in Merry Olde England at the moment, over a numer of issues. Whatever. I'm in the camp of "the whole point of 1776 and after is for me not to care about the U.K.". Including the royal family, et al. But, apparently, one of the police commissioners on that side of the pond has opined that they may very well seek to charge, extradite, and convict Americans (and others) who make social media posts of which the powers-that-be do not approve. Hurumph. First off, you appear to have greatly overestimated your capabilities, good sir. Secondly, reference the above revolution, you may feel free to pack sand. Thirdly, as said in another moment, molon labe (bring it on, in the modern vernacular)...

Dad Joke

Since my offspring refused to appreciate it, I will share here for even more mockery :D See, there's this grumpy woman who lives on the edge of the city. She mixes up potions and medicines for the locals, and is well-known. Of course, she's also overly-nosy and judgemental about her neighbors and those passing through. Townsfolk call her the Apotha-Karen...

Cultural Differences

If nothing else does, the near-ubiquitous presence of heated toilet seats argues for a superiority of Asian culture.

Time and Place

OK, for folks everywhere. Unless your genitalia are literally on fire, there is not a single converastion we may be having which requires you to continue/initiate/return a phone call while you are performing private bodily functions. I promise, whatever I have, it can wait til you are done. Seriously. Those of you doing it on speaker phones in public restrooms are even worse. Stop that crap. *NOTE* If your genitalia actually ARE on fire, please call someone more experienced and equipped to deal with such issues than myself, for both our sakes.

Decorum

There are times to be neat, polite, prim, and all that fancy stuff. A proper chili dog should make a mess when you eat it. This is not up for debate.

Veteran's Day

Going to change up the message a bit this year. Thank YOU. For the opportunity to let me serve something greater than myself. For the chance to be alongside some of the best men and women I've ever met, in good times and bad. For teaching me skills and discipline which are still with me today. For allowing me to travel the world, and realize how similar we all are. For challenging me in ways I never expected, and rewarding me in ways I still am learning. I'm humbled to have played my own, small part. Thank you to my nation for the chance.